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Here are a few commonly held beliefs, or “myths,” that hold many of us back from achieving success…

Myth #1: I don’t have what it takes to be successful and wealthy.

Fact: Successful people were not born that way. In fact, many of the most successful people today had very difficult lives. They were regular people who wished for more. And they decided to do something about it - to change their circumstances. Anyone can do the same, including you and I.

Myth 2: I don’t have any experience or education in anything.

Fact: Many successful people started with no experience. Many of them also flunked high school and never had any college education.

The only way to get real education and experience in anything is by doing, by “starting.” Once you start doing it, you learn very quickly.

Think of all the things that you know how to do. Driving a car, riding a bike, playing sports, reading, writing, speaking…even walking. All of these things have one thing in common: at one time in your life, you didn’t know how to do any of them.

And despite how impossible it seemed at the time, you decided to do it anyway. It’s the same with everything in life. You learn by doing. You get experience by doing something a few times. Get started. Do it once, twice, three times and you’re already on your way to becoming an expert in no time!

Myth 3: To be successful, I have to start a business, and I’m just not cut out to be a businessperson. I don’t have what it takes.

Fact: Listen…I know a few people who can barely read or write. Yet they’re running their own businesses. It’s scary, I know. But think about it…right now, at this moment, you’re already several giant steps ahead of them.

The only difference between a person who’s thinking about starting a business and another who is running a business is just that. One of them is doing what the other is only “thinking” of doing. They both had the same ideas and dreams. They both probably had the same doubts and fears as well. But one of them decided to start anyway, to take action despite the doubts and fears. One of them decided that if other people could do it, then he could as well.

Myth 4: Money isn’t that important.

Fact: Tell that to the family who’s starving right now, or to the family who needs money for serious medical help for a member of their family. They’ll tell you how important money is.

We’ve been conditioned from Day 1 to believe that money is not important. We have been conditioned to believe that wanting money is wrong and unethical. And yet the entire world seems to run on money.

It is one of the biggest myths known to man. And it’s one of the main reasons why the majority of the people are not wealthy.

Money is simply a way to measure the amount of value you create for others. If you have a lot of money, it means you have created a lot of value for other people. If you don’t have the kind of money you’d like to have, that simply means that you just haven’t yet found a way to produce the kind of value for others that you’re capable of, or the value that you’d like to.

Just look around you at the countries or even cities that have lack of money. You’ll find that in these same places, there are usually more crimes being committed, more people taking advantage of others, more diseases, more suffering, more deaths, and none or very little education.

Money may not be the most important thing in life, but let’s face facts here… Money is pretty darned important in this day and age. It’s how you support yourself! It’s how you buy food, water, shelter, and clothing. It’s how you pay the medical bills. It’s how you help and support others around you, including your loved ones. And we both know that those are very important things.

And by the way, if you feel that it’s more important to contribute to others than to be rich, well guess what, when you have more money, you can contribute more! You can do much more for others and you can help a lot more people when you have more money.

Only good things can come from having more money.

Myth 5: Money must be made slowly.

Fact: Nothing could be further from the truth. The only way to make money is to make it quickly! What good is money if you can’t enjoy it right now instead of 20 years from now? What good is money if you can’t contribute to others now as much as you’d like to, instead of 20 years from now?

The quicker you make money, the quicker you can change your life and the lives of those around you - for the better. There are no rules stating that money should be made slowly.

The only way to make money is to make it quickly! You will also find that the more money you make, the easier it becomes to make more because you begin to shift your focus from survival to abundance and contribution, in the process. And that shift in focus simply attracts more wealth to you.

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Do you sometimes have the feeling that you’re running into the same obstacles over and over again? Many of my conflicts have the same feel to them, like “Hey, I think I’ve been here before,” but I can’t figure out how I wound up in the same place. The situation is different, but the conflict feels the same.

I first read this poem in “The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying” by Sogyal Rinpoche. When I “Googled” it, I found fourteen pages of links. It’s clearly a favorite with many people; I know it speaks volumes to me.

“Autobiography in Five Chapters”
1) I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk
I fall in.
I am lost . . . I am hopeless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

2) I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I’m in the same place.
But it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

3) I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in . . . it’s a habit
My eyes are open
I know where I am
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

4) I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk
I walk around it

5) I walk down another street.

Does this feel familiar? I am ready to learn that lesson! I’m sure that I’ve changed. I can see that hole coming a mile away. This time it will be different. I still end up falling in. Tired, sad and angry, I drag myself up once again. What was I supposed to learn here? I thought I learned that the last time.

Some conflicts seem to take years to unravel, but if we stay tuned, and our purpose is to look with curiosity and awareness, we will find the moment when we can step around the hole.

As I write, thinking about a recent stumble of my own, I am smiling a bit. From a distance, I watch myself drop into the hole - one I know well - and it’s kind of funny. And perhaps that is the way out - to laugh more often, to “love our mistakes,” as my friend says. I’ve heard it said that eventually we will laugh at all our mistakes - the trick is to laugh sooner. When I can laugh as I climb out of the hole, I’m on my way to finding the route around it, or better yet, that alternate street.

© 2005 Judy Ringer, Power & Presence Training

About the Author: Judy Ringer is Founder of Power & Presence Training, specializing in unique workshops on conflict, communication, and creating a more positive work environment. Judy is also a black belt in aikido, and is writing her first book on the connection between aikido, conflict, and living a more purposeful life. To sign up for more free tips and articles like these, visit http://www.JudyRinger.com

Note: You’re welcome to reprint this article as long as it remains complete and unaltered (including the ‘about the author’ info at the end).

When you think about the most successful, happy, fulfilled people you know, you could probably identify some characteristics these people have in common. If we were sitting together, I’m sure we could build a nice list of these characteristics, attributes, habits and attitudes.

Several years ago, when thinking about that question, I identified several things that those people shared that I wanted to incorporate into my habits more consistently. These things have made and continue to make a difference for my own personal and professional development.

These five things are truly universal - these five habits could make all of us more productive. After applying them more diligently in my life, I had them printed on the back of my business cards. That version of cards has since been replaced, but when one of those cards came across my desk, I was pleased with the ideas as I read them again, and decided I would describe them in this article.

Following then are the five actions I identified. When these actions are taken more often, they will become habits that will greatly impact our performance - in all parts of our life.

Read More. The statistics are horrible and sad. As a whole, Americans don’t read very much. Given that reading is one of the best ways for us to learn new ideas, techniques, skills and approaches, it only makes sense that reading is a key to our education, learning and growth. If you want to advance in any part of your life, make reading a part of your daily routine. Reading an average of 30 minutes a day will allow you to read one book per month in an area of interest or professional growth. That’s 12 books a year. How much of a difference could that make in your performance?

Listen More. Listening gives us the chance to learn something. When you listen more intently you build the other person’s confidence and show, through your actions, that you value both them and their information. Really good active listening is a skill we all have -when the person or the topic is highly important to us we can listen very effectively. The challenge for us is to listen more intently, more of the time.

Ask “Why?” More. Exercise your curiosity! Asking why helps us determine the causes of problems (making it easier for us to solve them.) Asking why helps us learn about anything, when we ask it. Asking why can help us see things from a fresh perspective. As kids we ask this question incessantly. As adults we too often forget to ask it. Ask it already!

Smile More. If I could tell you that there is something you could do that takes almost no energy, costs you nothing and is guaranteed to improve your emotional health, and at the same time helps other people feel better too, you’d be interested in that wouldn’t you? Just smile. You will feel better when you do. And a smile is contagious - in a good way. It spreads good feelings and positive emotions. It reduces conflict and stress. Smiling more is perhaps the easiest of these habits to implement. And you can start right now.

Say “Thank You” More. It is one of the first interpersonal skills we teach children. We do it because we know that it is important. Saying thank you is the right thing to do. Say in person, say it in a handwritten note. Say it on the phone, say it in email. When you focus on a spirit of gratitude, it becomes easier. Like smiling, this one is easy to start right away.

These habits aid us in two major ways - they help us become more consistent and successful learners and they help us build better relationships by improving our interpersonal skills. Reading, listening, and exercising our curiosity certainly help us learn more about whatever we choose to learn about. And listening to others (really listening) is one of the best ways to improve relationships. Of course, smiling and saying thank you also make us more pleasant to be around, and encourage others to want to build relationships with us too!

Kevin Eikenberry is a leadership expert and the Chief Potential Officer of The Kevin Eikenberry Group (http://KevinEikenberry.com), a learning consulting company. To receive a free Special Report on leadership that includes resources, ideas, and advice go to http://www.kevineikenberry.com/leadership.asp or call us at (317) 387-1424 or 888.LEARNER.